Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Eek. Birthday bitch.

I am turning 31. Thirtyfuckingone. Gross. I am not bummed about not accomplishing any real goals by my 31st year. Eff that noise. I just don't want to get older and uglier.
I am extremely stoked for my birthday shindig this weekend. Ew. 31 yr olds definitely say "shindig".
I am having what the kids call a "house party" on Saturday.. I was going to have this themed awesomely decorated party but now I'm thinking more thrown together at last minute...
I am also dyeing a scandalous dress a deep red. I hope. The shirts I dyed red turned out...but the navy blue is some kinda buuuuulllshit.... My wonderfully creative and beautiful friend Sarah Dos is gonna do my make up and she said it's gonna be crazy! I LOVE CRAZY!
I'll post pictures. I gotta go play "Fashion Shoot" in the bathroom now.

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Lone Wolf.

For how chatty I am and with this new quest for fame, you would think I LOVE going out and being surrounded by people. FALSE. I'd much prefer staying in, far away from people, snuggling my kitten cat babies. Meow Meow is purring in my lap as I type. I don't get a lot of time alone. Especially, this week. I need time for me when I am absolutely SURE no one will disrupt me as I sing, clean, rearrange, make shit, internet and talk to my kitties... I coo at my cats.
I am going to die the death of a spinster. Sigh. Moo will probably eat my corpse.
I couldn't be more excited because today I am going to make dog biscuits and dye some fabrics. All by my lonesome. Fuck yes! Insert maniacal cackle here.


Monday, January 24, 2011

Uh. What?

In the past couple days, it has been determined that my roommate has some asshole tendencies. Fuck that shit. I want to move out so bad..and I could move in with my bro and his gf (I used to hate her but now I love her, also remember that Guns and Roses song?) but my cats are dicks and they have a dog named Moose and a cat named kitten babies can just fucking deal with it if it has to happen...Being a parent is hard. Especially to two dickhead cats.
I wish I could move far away from Mn..somewhere warm and where people care about fashion...
I sometimes wish I would of just sold out and married to whoever loved me and farted out four kids but then I think that is not who I am..I am not a kid yeller sweatpants wearer...
But I  better get off (heehee) the internet because my room is so messy, I've lost my house key..

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Drinking less means cleaning more.

Ive been takin' a break from the booze. Namely, Jameson Irish Whiskey. This means I'm spending a lot of time at the crib...Especially since its like a hundred degrees below zero. I am loving this time with my cats. Meow Meow had a really hard time when my brother moved out and my roomie moved in..  I was also working a shit ton and sucked at parenting. Now I kinda got their routines down. Moo's mostly consists of begging for food, pissing on clothes on the floor, eating food, loudly slurping at his fur with horrible death breath, sleeping and dropping atomic bombs into the litter box... Meows involves pettings, biting, hissing, running, kicking ass and taking names, with some naps throw in..she eats after she fucks shit up..mostly strings..
Anyhoo, I'm organizing and cleaning and making stuff. I made laundry detergent today. I'll post pics soon but right now I have a glitter spill to clean up. Bitch ass glitter.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

I guess I'm not one of those everyday bloggers.

Since I've last posted here has what happened...
Researching acting classes. Fo' sho gonna take Improv Classes.
Got an old phone that I need to exchange for a new phone.
Disowned my sister and a cousin. Long ass white trash story.
Reconnected with my Grandma and Aunt... My Grandma and I are close but my aunt is newly in my life. My dad hates her.
I fell in lust with a boy. He doesn't even know there is a raping in his future.
I took adorable pics/vids of my cats.
I laughed and laughed and laughed.
I bought beauty products galore.
I live in Minnesota. Its January. I just got a pair of winter boots..$15 moon boots from the Gap! 
I have been told, its obvs Ive lost weight. Watching what you eat and increasing your physical activity even a little bit works wonders.
On that note, I looked fucking hot today. 

Saturday, January 15, 2011


OMG BITCHES! I just found the website Lulu's and I have like 300 boners for nearly EVERYTHING! Sigh. Goddamn college takin' all my money.

Friday, January 14, 2011


I have been one depressed bitch this week. I'm totally over it. and I'm pretty sure it was the winter blues. I used to wonder if I got more depressed during the winter or was it because I was in shitty relationships during the cold months? I am mostly single and its mos def winters fault and not my sucking at picking out boyfriends fault..
My roomie told me Meow Meow caught a mousey but it got away behind the refrigerator. I moved the fridge and there is a bunch of hair ties that Meow steals and loses and a ton of mouse shit. I'm not scared of mice and feel that one or both of the cats will search and DESTROY!
Roomie also said Meow Meow loved torturing that mousey. Hahahaha! Meow is a cat! Cats do that!
I have been using Lush Retread Conditioner on my overly processed but still gorgeous hair. It is making my hair TOO HEALTHY! Can you believe it? I have to wash my hair even less to achieve my sexy bedroom hair...
Since March I have lost 35 pounds. It's crazy. All my old blog posts featuring my photo remind me of the chubs. Turns out when you eat nonstop and exercise less, you turn into a fat ass.